Sunday, January 10, 2016


The word resolution, in the context of "New Year’s resolutions", is defined as a firm decision to do or not do something. If you have made New Year’s resolutions this year, how do you feel when you hear this definition? 

For me, it feels heavy. It's very black and white, and by mere definition, it seems we set ourselves up for failure. I’ve been averse to setting NY resolutions for many years, in part because I don’t like being ‘told’ what to do or when to do it, and I tend to resist fads. But mostly it’s because typically, they don’t work. At the very least, they don’t last. If they did, people wouldn’t be making the same resolutions year after year. I posted this amusing meme, below, on my Facebook page this week and many people liked and shared it.  this indicates to me that people can relate to the transience of so called "New Year’s resolutions" and especially those relating to diet and exercise.

Don’t get me wrong.  As a Life Coach, (and person) I am absolutely in favor of personal growth, living into and up to our potential and purposely creating fulfilling, joyful and balanced lives.  However, it is this commercial push to “just do it” and the feelings, energy and mode of implementation generally associated with New Year's resolutions with which I take issue. 

Instead of resolutions, why not try setting intentions and creating a vision for your life? One way to do this is by creating a VISION BOARD. Simply stated, a vision board is any sort of board on which you display images that represent whatever you want to be, do or have in your life.    

They are not magic boards and I’m in no way implying that because you place something on your board it will just appear in your life.  However, by spending the time to consider what you want, what you don’t want, and intentionally choosing images that reflect your desires and the feelings they evoke, you start the process of manifestation. Simply creating the board is not enough;  we must also create a plan and take actions that bring us closer to our goals and dreams. Although vision boards are only a part of the visioning process, they are a very powerful part. And, THEY WORK!

If you would like to learn more about what vision boards are, how to make and use them and even get some support in creating a vision for your life, join me this Saturday, Jan 16th for a Vision Board Workshop.

Monday, January 4, 2016


What are you “going back to” today? For most people it’s WORK. Last night and this morning, social media was inundated with people bemoaning it, in their own words and with memes, (some pretty funny), about going back to work.  My friend shared this one:

Regardless of how you feel about your job, even if you enjoy it and find it fulfilling, the resistance is sometimes more about going back to the structured routine, including getting up early and ‘doing’ the commute. For many people, with and without ADD, we have a love/hate relationship with unstructured time. (I use the term we here, because I absolutely fall into this category.)  We crave it and love it because we hate HAVING to be places at certain times, or doing things that we just don’t feel like doing at that moment, (especially if we finally got focused and are being productive) but we SO need it to survive.  When we have big chunks of unstructured time, there are just so many choices and possibilities. It’s awesome!  And HORRIBLE! It often triggers serious inertia and paralysis.

For some folks, these feelings of inertia and losing time may actually have occurred during the time off between Xmas and New Year’s and truth be told, many are actually relieved to get back to their routine. But even so, there is often a sense of disappointment, sadness and general crankiness that not enough was done, whether it be projects or just plain fun and relaxation.  For the people who are not at all relieved,  now it can be JUST. SO. DIFFICULT. TO. MOTIVATE.  With all of the built-in deadlines, imposed “necessities”, freer eating, drinking, playing and napping surrounding the holiday season, the adrenaline and dopamine were in high supply.  And now…. CRASH.  Before, there was overflow; now everything seems to be in short supply: energy, motivation, positivity, food, time, good feels…

Although many people do feel a sense of renewal, currently and temporarily charged up by New Year’s Resolutions, this is not the case for everyone.  If you are one of the people feeling a bit lost, you are definitely NOT alone!

Although it's not my intent in writing this to simply provide “tips”, there is one thing I would like to suggest:

If you notice you're judging yourself for feeling like this,
or“shoulding” yourself about your state of mind… 

You feel what you feel and if you resist what is, you are just wasting precious energy. Sometimes, that simple allowing is enough for you to soften and breathe more easily and that just might be enough - for now.  Also, when you give yourself permission to feel what you are feeling (even if unpleasant) often, a natural shift occurs.  If nothing else, you buy back a bit of energy which had been lost with all of that TRYING (and failing) to feel something other than what you are actually feeling.

If you’re not currently enjoying that sense of positivity and optimism that the new year brings to many, I’d love to hear from you to get an idea of how you are coping with this “back to work/routine” time of year.  I also invite you to share what you are doing, or what you have done to re-charge or to find new clarity and motivation.  Hey, and since I do tend to look on the bright side, here’s something good to think about: the sun will set at 4:25pm today, which is 3 minutes later than it set on January 1st.  :-)